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Incidentally, the story I posted earlier was only my SECOND-worst blind date. I guess I might as well post the worst one here while I'm at it... it involves drinking as well, but on my part in this case! I'll warn you that this is rather long (so I'm cutting it into 3 parts)... but worth it if you take sadistic pleasure in hearing of others' (my) misfortunes...
About 6 or 7 years ago, I came home from work one afternoon and logged onto my computer as usual. The very instant I signed on to Instant Messenger, a message popped up from a screenname I had never seen before that said, "It's about time!" I was confused and typed back, "Um... What?" "I said it's about time! I've been waiting for you all day!" Hesitantly I asked, "Um, do I know you?" "No! I read your profile and it was SO funny! I've been waiting for you all day! Can I call you?"
Yes, I stupidly gave her my phone number. As soon as I said "hello", she gasped. "Oh! I recognize your voice from somewhere! I don't know from where, but I know I know you somehow! Maybe it was in another life, haha." I thought this incredibly unlikely (and the haha at the end did sound strangely artificial...), but didn't argue the point. She asked if I wanted to go "grab a Coke somewhere and see a movie". I agreed (yeah, I was pretty desperate back then). We talked a while and I let it slip that I had won tickets to see CCR at the state fair the next week. She gushed about how much she would love to go, so I made my second huge mistake of the day and offered a SECOND date to somebody I had never met...
You're probably wondering how I could not realize yet that she was crazy. The answer is that of course I realized that. But I was operating under the misapprehension that she was crazy and HOT. Her name was Michelle... somebody named Michelle should be hot, right? Nothing could have been further from the truth...
I am not normally a superficial guy, but when I saw this chick standing in front of her apartment, I almost turned around and went home. In fact, I did drive by a couple times before my conscience got the better of me and forced me to go back. She got in the car, exclaiming, "Oh, thank God! I saw driving by and thought you weren't going to find me! I waved my arms, but I guess you didn't see..." (Yeah... that was it...)